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Dispatches from the Union Hall fight club

This is a Craigslist Missed Connection our friend wrote about a real thing that happened at Union hall last Saturday night, in which some of Team Brokelyn was involved. Our friend informs us it was written at 5am in a drunken tirade, but some of the phrasing is oh-so-delicious. NSFW!

Here is just a taste:

To the raging Thunder C*&%t at Union Hall last night. - w4w (Pound Town)


Date: 2012-06-10, 1:31PM EDTReply to: h322j-3069128423@pers.craigslist.org


I’m posting this because I believe my fist missed a connection with your face. Last night you decided to pour your entire beer down my leg and all over my bag at Union Hall in Park Slope. Your excuse, when I looked at you incredulously during a lulling rendition of “I’ll make love to you” by 2 white and adorably tone def beefcakes was, “I’m so drunk, shit happens.” LOVELY. Then, in my most darling voice, I called you a gigantic asshole. To which you replied with “You have no right to call me that you BITCH.” …Really? I think I might. Because not only did you get in my face and tell me we should “take this outside,” but your Boyfriend (which I can only imagine had an anal birth because he is this much of an asshole) decided it was a great idea to throw a drink in my face while my dear friend tried to get YOU away from me. Your boyfriend then proceeded to “fight” all of my guy friends who were trying to subdue him. I say “fight” because his tactics were the equivalent of someone turning on a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man. I can only imagine what he’s like in bed, and for that, I am truly sorry.
Read the rest, because the last line is my favorite. Really, Union Hall? Really?!?

Filed under union hall brooklyn brokelyn craigslist missed connections